, , ,

So since I have had a pretty terrible week that is now yesterday’ s news…I must do my hindsight perspective.

My depression has grown to unbelievable heights this week. I have cried so much and uncontrollably that I am amazed that my eyes still see. I have been wearing my glasses more just to ease my eyes from squinting. Not fun.
So today I fiddled on the computer during my break.

I’ve been enthralled and intrigued since I took the test of what my Scottish name would be.
That being Rhona. I had to get more meaning about the name.


Here’s the description and I was inspired and wowed. This describes me to the letter.
I love it.

It may seem silly but reading this helped me.
I’m so tired of crying and feeling sad and empty.
Brown nose people at work will never change. I must tune them out.
Something to work on…diligently.
They are not worth my energy.

I love the name Rhona and feel a kindred connection to its meaning.
It’s a start.

I took out my book and started rereading my brokers exam study guide on option hedging.
I felt a renewed sense of absorption.
It felt nice.
I finally had a day where I only cried once and not five times.

I’m exhausted beyond words.

A name can define oneself.
I like being Eva with a pinch of Rhona for inspiration.
It’s like living in a time period of yesteryear.

I love history and the old ways before electronic gadgets.
A nice idea in my mind and heart.

Who knows it may become a trend for me to be energetic and imaginative.

One day at a time and one moment at a time.

What do you think?